I want to acknowledge that these past couple of months have been completely life altering:
visiting family I haven’t seen in almost 8 years only to say goodbye and probably unlikely to see them for another couple of years but also realizing the importance of my immediate and close family that I have left,
graduating from a school and overcoming those hardships, checking my own educational privilege, and so many exciting future collaborations and conversations,
experiencing and producing deeply inspirational and powerful works and the excitement of networking and creating lifelong friendships with local and nonlocal artists,
getting fired from a job that created positive opportunities to follow and feeling torn for what path to follow,
taking the time to connect with friends but also understanding my desires to be alone or a friend to myself,
and finally, realizing that I can’t be everywhere at once and lives overlap and it’s not that people come and go, but energies are dispersed and simultaneously connected. I have a choice to feel, think, and act. I care about what others think but I also know that I will never fully understand anyone; our lives are shared experiences and it is up to the individual to make it meaningful. There isn’t just one truth.
I’ve been wanting to cry so many types of tears for what my world has come to be, and one always fears change especially when things are good. But then I realize that I’ve been smiling genuine smiles and intrinsically acting through kind gestures and thoughts. I’ve been stressed out in good ways, but also I am not afraid to take a stand against injustices. I feel a lot of love from my small world and lately, I’ve given a lot of love. I only have a slight idea of what’s to come, and I’m really looking forward to all of it: the good and the bad.